Over shabbos I had the opportunity to read an essay by R' Gil Student entitled "Ethical Dilemmas in Blogging". In it Gil breaks down many aspects related to J-blogging, if you get a chance you should read it (I used it to pass the time in shul). I was alerted to the article by R' Harry Maryles. Harry has a post where he discusses a point that Gil brings up that R' Matisyahu Solomon believes that there is no place for the children of bloggers in a Yeshiva (I wonder if the son of Mr. Ekstein, who runs Yeshiva World, will be thrown out of Yeshiva, how's that for irony). G-d forbid there should be someone in a Yeshiva that might dare and take issue with some of the nonsense that goes on, there is no place for dissention, we all need to walk in lockstep with the dictators and the chumra police, but I digress. The point I wanted to discuss is Gil says in his article that after the internet ban was issued, to quote "A friend of mine drove through Lakewood about a year after the internet was banned there. He drove slowly around various frum neighborhoods with his laptop next to him and he tried to connect to any wireless networks that were available. Rabbosai, he was amazed at how many families not only have internet access but wireless. I don’t even have wireless. Banning doesn’t work." (On a side note, my father's friend suggested to me that in these tough economic times a good side business would be to approach the yeshivos with and have an "internet detection company". For a fee I and my staff will drive around the charedi neighborhoods and vet out those people with wireless internet in the house.) Back to the point at hand, we already know banning does not work, just look at how many people listened to R' Elyashiv when a few weeks ago during a shiur he publicly banned woman wearing shaitles. Right away people were out there saying it's not what he meant; it's not what he said, blah blah blah. That leads me to ask, what good is screaming about following so called daas torah if you only choose to follow it when it is convenient for you or when you can rub it in people's faces. Why is the ban on the internet and on shaitles not being adhered to as strictly as the ban from flying El Al or not going to the "Main Event" concert last year? The answer is because the majority of charedim who yell and scream about following daas torah only do so when it is convenient for them and it doesn’t effect their day to day lives. They will burn garbage cans and beat up Dati Leumi girls for daring to walk on the street but in the closed doors of their homes they are hypocrites. Yes, throw the kids out of school if their fathers (or mothers) are bloggers, this is something we can follow. Well how about throwing out of yeshiva all the people who's mother's wear shaitles, after all, there was an edict issued by the head of your community, the pope of the charedim, the leader of so called daas torah. (On a side note, one of the only groups of people who generally do not wear shaitles to cover their hair are those in the dati leumi camp and followers of Rav Kook; some sefardim also b/c R' Ovadia says they shouldn't but the majority of charedi sefardi woman do). So next time someone yells and screams about so called daas torah, ask them if they have the internet in their homes or if their wives wear shaitles.

I saw a new blog that I wanted to mention Orthowatch . Another frustrated M/O blogger. Welcome, chazak ve'ematz.

I hate nearly everything about Brooklyn. From the holier than thou people in the Orthodox community to driving on streets where people don't care about the other people driving or the law (double parking, crossing over double yellows, right of way etc.), to charging me for cutting my bagel. However, the one thing I knew I could count on was that when it snowed my street would be cleaned by the great men of the NYC sanitation department. In fact NY does a great job in cleaning all the streets. Which brings me to the great suburban town I currently live in; I have never seen a worse job of plowing in my life and it probably would have been less hazardous had they left the snow on the ground instead of doing half a job after the snow had turned to ice. There are very few streets you can drive down in my town that have been cleared, even the main road ways. There is one main street where you can see where the borough line ends and the new one begins by how much better the other town plows the streets. For the amount of money I pay in farshtunkineh property taxes they should have gold plated snow plows out there for each street. I sent a strongly worded letter (anonymously of course, don't need my taxes going up any more) to the mayor voicing my disappointment with the job they did and I will be sending an equally strongly worded letter to the county. This is a disgrace. I urge all of you who live in my town to do the same, the mayors address can be found on the borough website. It's time our tax dollars went to good use. At least Brooklyn has clean streets!

First off, I must commend Yeshiva World and Vos Iz Neias on their stellar reporting on all aspects of the Bernie Madoff scandal. Not an hour goes by where they don't have some kind of an update portraying Madoff's ties to YU and the over all Modern Orthodox community in the worst possible light leaving the comment sections open to the bright comments like "how can YU have an endowment of $1.2 Billion dollars when there are kids in charedi communities in Israel going to sleep hungry at night?”, I'll let them figure out the answer to that on their own (perhaps they should get jobs). So bravo to you on the in depth investigative reporting not leaving one stone unturned, perhaps in the future these same standards of reporting will be applied to swindlers in the charedi community and child molesters in the charedi yeshivos.

That being said, how low of a human being must a person be to take money designated for charities and include it in the biggest ponzie scheme in the history of financial markets. Stealing is wrong on every possible conceivable level, but stealing from tzdakah, from yeshivos, and hospitals and shuls and charitable trusts etc, I believe there is a special place in hell reserved for a man like that. The amount of wealth stolen from these people is truly astonishing. Old couples in Florida wiped out of their life savings with no hope of being able to regain it, forced to sell their houses and other assets. One thing a place like YU was able to rely on for many years was that if they needed money for a project or they had a short fall, for the most part, all they needed to do was make a call to one of their donors and the money was generally there. But what has happened now is this lowlife has stolen money from the people who were most willing and able to donate it. I don't think we are prepared for the hell storm which is about to ensue on our community and institutions. UJA, who supports all kinds of programs, from charedi summer camps to meals for the poor; they and their donors were taken by this guy. Rennert, who gave millions to all tzdakos (except KBY) annually was taken by this guy, and the list goes on. YU, SAR, Ramaz, Kahal Yeshurun, Maimonides in Boston, and the list goes on and on. As President Joel so eloquently stated in his letter to the YU community, "We all should use these times to reflect on our blessings but also to reflect on our responsibilities. We should constantly be communally introspective and focus on advancing our ideals. The times are appropriate for us to focus on our core values, to practice and refine them and to share them with the world. We can and should always advance. Yeshiva University is committed to engaging in that conversation with other people of good will. I thank you for your interest, commitment and support". It's, unfortunately at times like this that we get an opportunity to introspect into the things that are truly important in our lives, health, family and the such. May this mamzer rot in hell.

I got flack a number of days ago from a few people for referring to an individual as a"carpetbagger". One of the definitions given for it on Wikepidia is " .....the term has been used more widely in the US to describe outsiders' attempting to gain political office or economic advantage, especially in areas (thematically or geographically) to which they previously had no connection".
On to the discussion at hand. For some reason there seems to be an edict from Lakewood that they have an achraius of sorts to take their brand of frumkiet and sell it to the masses, regardless if the masses want it or not. This includes but is not limited to opening up Lakewood satellite Yeshivos in any part of America where there might possibly be a viable frum Modern Orthodox neighborhood, because as we all know, Modern Orthodoxy is nothing more than a sham by people who don't want to follow halacha and is doomed to fail in the next few years, much like the haskalah. And when these Modern Orthodox neighborhoods wakeup and realize that their brand of Judaism is flawed we will be there to pick up the pieces and show them how to return to authentic "yidishkiet". The question I have is what are these people contributing to the communities on the larger scale? Most of these yeshivos do not have locals learning in either their high schools or betei midrashim, but they import them from satellite charedi communities, their hashkafos, for the most part, are not in line with probably close to 80% of the people who live in these communities. Many of the neighborhoods are self sustaining when it comes to religiosity with, BH, many YU musmachim and talmidie chachachim who give shiurim and promote learning and yiras hashem. As is the case in some of these areas (perhaps not all) the people in charge of these institutions will tell those learning in the Yeshiva that the Kashrus in town is not up to par and WE need to begin to oversee the kashrus and give our own hashgachos. The eruv in town is not good enough, but for a fee, WE can inspect the eruv and make sure it meets OUR standards. There have been times when some of the hanhala in these yeshivos have spoken out against certain events that were being run by the community because they don't fit in with their view of "yidishkeit". And then they expect to be financially supported by members of the community. It is important to have viable torah institutions in all frum communities, but why do all frum communities need to have charedi institutions? There is a reason that YU has not opened a kollel in Lakewood, because it is not the place for it and not necessary. I would like to think that we, in the Modern Orthodox world know our place and it's not Lakewood. What are they adding to being in our communities other than machlokes? To quote a line from a great movie "great ambition and conquest without contribution is without significance." So I ask you, what is their significance? What do they add to our communities that we would not otherwise have on our own? Shiurim? We have shiurim. A beis medrash? We already have them? High schools??? Kollels? Is there any real significant contribution to our communities? Carpetbaggers indeed.

The chickens (hopefully not Rubashkin) are coming home to roost in Lakewood. VIN is reporting that due to an inability to pay their teacher, Beis Faiga, the largest Beis Yaakov in Lakewood is closed due to a teacher's strike. A bit more research (reading the comments) reveals that this school "prides itself" on rejecting girls who come from families where the fathers work and instead tries to only accept girls from homes where the fathers are learning (or whatever it is they do in kollel). Rationally, if no one is working and can't pay full tuition who, then, is paying for the school to run? Why the father-in-law of course. But what happens in a market downturn where the father-in-laws and the few askanim who actually work can no longer afford to support the institutions? They close (1800 girls are now out of school). (Per the article, the strike was sanctioned by “daas torah”). Will this unfortunate circumstance, which I am sure is not the last, encourage the community to perhaps reexamine their view of parents working? According to Lakewood Falling Down a bunch of the Rabbonim from Lakewood were in Flatbush over Shabbos with their hands out, but still bashing college and working class. How can you ask for money out of one side of your mouth and bash the means that the person got the money out of the other side. MOChassid has a few posts about what he fears is coming next to the frum community and I believe we are going to see these institutions, both here and in Eretz Yisrael, begin to fold as quickly as the banks. The bottom line is that it is time for all of us, not just those in Lakewood, to begin to examine our way of life and lifestyle. However, I think that in communities where people are encouraged not to work and G-d (the father in law) will provide for them, this economic downturn is going to be felt the hardest. I do not, however, believe that this will change the communal attitude towards people learning vs. working. If this does not wake them up I am not sure what will.

I appreciate all of the feedback that my Avos U Banim post has generated, both online and off, it shows the importance of having an arena of public opinion where issues can be discussed and debated. Allow me to clarify the point of my post:
The purpose of the Avos U Banim learning is to show our children the importance of learning in a communal setting, and as should be the final outcome it is chinuch and l'hagdil torah ulehaadira. Parents can choose to learn with their kids at home, but it is a great reinforcer to have the community come together and have programs that encourage this. In the community in which I live there are currently 2 ways of doing this. The first shul to set up the program, under the guidance and leadership of the Rav, set it up as a parent child learning group so both men and woman can learn with their sons and daughters. The Second Rav setup his program as strictly an Avos U Banim in the Yeshiva so that the fathers and sons in his shul could be influenced by both learning together and doing it in an environment where they are surrounded by other people who are learning as well. I have no problem with either of these approaches and it gives people in the community the option of choosing if they want to learn in an all male environment or if they want to expose their kids to something different (perhaps we can set up a mother daughter learning program as well). Now on to the third Shul. The rav of this shul, who is a dynamic young talmid chacham who puts chinuch at the forefront on nearly every issue, was approached to set up an Avos U Banim. The Rav felt that for the purposes of his Kehilla it would be more conducive to have a parent child learning, where woman and girls would be able to learn as well. Some people in the shul had the azus panim to publicly challenge the Rav's decision. This, in my opinion, shows a tremendous amount of chutzpah. He is the Rav and knows what is best for his Kehilla, and to use archaic arguments of, men and woman should not be learning in the same place or, woman can learn with their daughters at home, when the rav chose to take a different approach is out of line. People contribute in different ways to a community, and all (most) contributions are welcomed and helpful, however at the end of the day it is the job of the Rabbi to have the final say and to question him publicly on a hashkafic issue like this one shows a lack of respect.

Last night I had the great opportunity to hear a shiur from Rav Chaim Druckman on Geirus. As aformentioned, my family goes back with Rav Druckman many years. The shiur was very good and he spoke about what he went through and how he was converting Jews to Judaism after the influx of people from the former Soviet Union, something which is a new phenomenon of the last 200 years. He then described how he was treated by R' Sherman of the charedi beis din and he said, what they did is not even wrong or neged halacha but it was "evil" to use his word. He said that he was never consulted about the issue but R'Sherman wrote a "psak din", which Rav Druckman was told about afterwards, and only after he was ambushed was he given a chance to respond. He said he chose not to respond because due to the fact that this R' Sherman already made up his mind and wrote a "psak", the only thing that would have happed would have been a public lynching by the charedim and he did not need that. This is a man who has been involved in building the State since its inception and whose ahavas Yisrael knows no bounds and he is being treated like an ignorant am ha'aretz, if not worse. The whole thing is enough to make you sick and really question the true motives of the charedim. They didn't try to help or reach out to these Geirim who’s lives they just destroyed, they simply passed a psak that everything needed to be done according to them or else it is wrong. I then wake up this morning and read that after a failed run for the Jerusalem mayorship Meyer Porush is starting his own Charedi daily newspaper (presumably to go after Hamodia which wasn't exactly supportive of him during the election). The name of the newspaper is going to be Hamevaser (clearly ripped off from YU's own Hamevaser) and here is the kicker, the motto of the news paper is: Ha'iton shel hayahadut hane'emanah. Although this might be referring the news being ne'eman somehow I feel that the true intentions are to imply that his "brand" of Judaism is the only one that is ne'eman. No concern for ahavas Yisrael, just further fractioning the religious, and now even the charedim. This from the guy who promised the charedim will be taking over Israel in the next few years. Uganda here we come.

It looks like for the second consecutive year my son's teacher got it right. Every year when the Yaakov and Eisav project comes home I like to see how the teacher portrays the Avos. This year it looks like they are, once again, depicted as not being Yeshivish. Yaakov is wearing a blue shirt yellow yarmulkah and Khakis. I guess progress is being made in Modern Orthodox Day schools. I don't so much mind the wool tzitzis b/c, you see, Eisav's coat can be removed and placed on Yaakov.

Is there room for a middle ground in Orthodoxy, or better yet in Modern Orthodoxy? I ask this question because of two events I witnessed over the weekend. The first was a number of people in one of the shuls which I attend attempted to force the Rav to change the Motzei Shabbos learning from that of a parent child nature (fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, fathers and daughters, mothers and sons) to a more charedi version of Avos U banim where only fathers and sons were permitted to attend and woman who wanted to learn with their daughters (this is a direct quote) "can do it at home". From a practical standpoint, why should boys who’s fathers can’t make it on Motzai shabbos lose out and why should parents who do not have boys miss out on this great opportunity to foster a relationship of learning. This set me off for a few reasons, but first some back ground, I attend three of the shuls in my neighborhood. One of them, the more established, and oldest shul has a rav who is a tremendous talmid chacham and lamdan and he has a parent child learning. The other shul I attend (and regularly frequent) started a few years ago and it is attended by more of the "frummer" elements of the neighborhood, the ones who are interested in starting a "Yeshiva Gedolah". The rav in that shul is also a big talmid chacham and he tends to tilt more to the Right and for that, and a number of other logistical reasons began an "Avos U Banim" with the local Yeshiva Gedolah. Then there is the last shul, the Rav, in attempt to follow the lead of the first Rav in town wanted to have an inclusive learning program where parents and children can learn together and both girls and boys can see the importance of learning and what place it has in the community. From my vantage point I think this is great and I will try to only attend a program where my kids can see that learning is just as important for woman as it is for men and it is OK for men and woman to learn in the same environment, especially if it is sanctioned by the local rabbonim. Although some may disagree with this the majority of the community in which I live, I like to think, agrees with this philosophy. Those that disagree can go to the Avos U banim in the other shul, so everyone has a venue and a place and everyone can be happy (at the end of the day the fanatics did not win out and the woman will be permitted to attend the learning program). So I was thinking how crazy these people were it seems we’ve taken two steps forward in showing girls the importance of learning only to have these people take ten steps back by trying to insist that the woman’s place is home baking. This morning I attended a local minyan and there was a woman there for her father's Yahrzteit (I know his b/c they made a Keil Maleh), and she did not seem to be able to follow along very well, however, as I thought would happen, as we got to the end she began to recite Kadish, to herself, but it was plain to see (I know I should not have been looking over the mechitzah; I was davening right next to it and it was not that high up AND THAT IS NOT THE POINT). This did not sit well with me because my thinking on this is that if you can have the Rabbi or Gabbai say Kadish for you why must you make a statement and say it yourself. I am struck by the contradiction in my thought, on the one hand I think it is of the utmost importance that woman learn, on the other hand I think it is very questionable when a woman wants to recite Kaddish. Is this a contradiction or is there room for a middle ground? Can we say that something’s are important for progress and others are not? Can I have it both ways?