There has been a lot of reaction to Rabbi Horowitz's article on abuse that was published on many of the J-blogs last week. Much of the reaction has been positive and people are pleased that there are people speaking out about this most important topic but some people are attacking Rabbi Horowitz for his stance on the Markey bill, some people in comment sections and some people directly in their posts. Let me first say that on this issue I think that Markey bill should be allowed to pass and if the yeshivos knew about what was going on and chose to cover it up, as was the case with Kolko and Torah Temima, let the victims come forward and sue the school and if they win and it forces the schools to close down so be it. They were responsible and let them reap what they sowed.
I will, however, say if you dismiss what Rabbi Horowitz has to say on abuse because of this one issue you are simply ignorant and dead wrong. There has been NO ONE in the charedi community who has done more for abuse victims than Rabbi Horowitz. Both behind the scenes and in public he has been at the forefront of this issue and has helped bring justice for the victims. Further more he is, in my opinion, one of the few level headed leaders in the charedi community who has spoken out on this issue time and again. He has told the Moetzes what is really going on while others in the community tried to cover it up and he has advocated for victims rights at every turn. To simply dismiss what he has to say and throw the baby out with the bath water because you disagree with him on this issue is idiotic. I can see things from his perspective on this, to cause the closure of many yeshivos will in the long run hurt the system instead of helping it. Instead try to fix it from the inside. Fire those responsible for the abuse and cover up, put new leadership into place and move forward. Rabbi Horowitz has taken unpopular stands when it comes to issues with the charedi community and has often pitted himself against the status quo when he feels that what is going on is not right and on this issue he feels that it is better for the community for this bill not to pass. He was attacked and defended his position from a level headed stand point.
On this issue and many others Rabbi Horowitz has not been afraid to go against the grain. He has done more for the frum community than many will ever know about both behind the scenes and in public. His advocating for radical changes in the chinuch system and Project Yes are things that no one else in the charedi community were willing to do, even when a failed system was staring them in the face. The frum community should have more hakaras ha tov for him than nearly anyone else because he advocates for what is right. I will publicly say: Rabbi Horowitz, thank you for once again standing up for what is right and coming to the defence of the those who could not defend themselves. May you continue in your mission to fight vehemently for our community on the abuse issue and many others. Chazak V' Ematz.
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Abuse Survivors; Please Do Not Suffer Alone
There are currently a lot of rumors floating around the Internet about the death of Motty Borger and what lead up to it, including allegations of molestation. Due to the fact that nothing has been verified I will not post any links. As I mentioned in my last post on this, even if the allegations turn out to be false there is a lot our community can learn from this. First and foremost more still needs to be done to expose child molesters in our community. There is no excuse not to go directly to the authorities, and by authorities I mean law enforcement and not rabbonim. If the allegations of molestation turn out to be true and there were people who knew and did not tell the kallah and her family, or even if they had no direct knowledge but heard the rumors and they did nothing to alert the kallah and her family, they are responsible for this young boys death and in my opinion have a din of rotzchim. Although I was hesitant to post on this Rabbi Yaakov Horowitz, someone I have tremendous admiration for has penned an essay together with Dr. Bentzion Twersky regarding lessons that can be learned from this tragic incident.
11/19/09
This essay will appear in next week’s Jewish Press. Generally, as per my arrangement with The Jewish Press, I do not post columns until the issue is on the newsstand. However, due to the nature and timeliness of this subject, The Jewish Press is permitting its release prior to publication as a public service.
Abuse Survivors; Please Do Not Suffer Alone
By: Dr. Benzion Twerski and Rabbi Yakov Horowitz
In recent days, reports have circulated in the media and on the Internet about the tragic early passing of yet another young man in our community. Those reports indicate that the trauma of childhood abuse followed him and complicated his adult life to the point that it impinged on the quality of his personal relationships.
It is not the intent of these lines to substantiate these reports nor is it to dismiss them. Rather, we wish to use the opportunity presented by this horrible calamity and the dialogue it has created on the internet and in the street to once again loudly and forcefully reiterate the message we have been projecting for many years to victims of abuse – “Please reach out for help and do not suffer alone.”
For even in the event that the facts as reported in this particular tragedy are not accurate, they are most certainly consistent with the pattern we have unfortunately seen over and over again, where victims of childhood abuse go through unspeakable agony as they attempt to singlehandedly deal with the toxic aftereffects of the trauma they suffered in their formative years. We have each encountered numerous instances where untreated childhood abuse follows victims into adulthood, shredding their marriages and rendering them often incapable of entering into a loving and intimate relationship with their spouses until a trained mental health professional helps them sort things out. We have each been involved with more than a few childhood abuse victims who became addicted to heroin and/or cocaine, in an unsuccessful attempt to wash away the searing pain of their trauma. We have each paid more than a few shiva calls to families of abuse victims, who years and even decades later took their own lives.
There are a number of reasons why abuse victims would not avail themselves of intervention and assistance. Some are understandably reluctant or frightened to share the facts of their abuse with others. Others, who did have the courage to confide in adults in their lives were encouraged or intimidated into remaining silent – especially if the perpetrator is a respected individual or a close family member. This sends a horrible message to the victim – that he or she has done something that cannot see the light of day. The result is a that a never-ending video loop now plays in the mind of the victim, as societal pressure abuses them again and again, by forcing them to remain silent and unsupported.
There are many events that simultaneously involve more than one “system.” For example, when one gets arrested for driving under the influence which caused injuries or death, there are criminal penalties for drunk driving and financial reparations due for the damages caused. However, neither of these tracks deals with the fact that the perpetrator has a drinking problem. Courts realize they cannot treat alcoholism, as revoking licenses, impounding cars, and even jail terms will not prevent recidivism – especially if treatment is warranted but not followed.
Various efforts have been undertaken in recent years – all of which are necessary – in the arenas of prevention, education, training, and the need for reporting. And we both have proudly participated in many of them. However, despite the fact that these initiatives and the awareness they generate are often soothing to past abuse victims, none of these help them regain their footing. Only therapy by a licensed and trained professional can accomplish that.
We are therefore reaching out to anyone who was ever abused or molested in their childhood years and begging you to please do yourself the ultimate favor and get help.
Therapy may not solve all issues in your life, but it will do much to make your future brighter and filled with greater promise. In fact, many survivors thrive and build beautiful lives for themselves and their families following successful treatment.
It may be true that some people are resilient and survive with little apparent damage (apparent is the operative word). However, this is not the norm, and with the dangers involved, we would not recommend that you even risk this small chance. So; for your sake, and for the sake of your spouse and children, please, please get help.
This may mean several things:
Contact a mental health professional who is experienced in counseling trauma victims. (I strongly feel that well-intentioned individuals like me, who do not have professional training in abuse treatment, are not equipped to deal with these issues and should limit our involvement to supporting the efforts of the professionals, and steering those who seek our guidance in these matters directly to them. Y.H.)
Get information about trauma and its effects.
Connect with other victims/survivors. The camaraderie and support are invaluable.
We strongly suggest that you ignore those who inform you, that getting married and starting a family will help you, “Get over it.” Experience has taught us that it will often complicate things rather than heal them.
Please, please do not suffer alone. Reach out for help today.
In closing, we offer you our sincere and heartfelt bracha that Hashem grant you menuchas hanefesh and simchas hachayim (tranquility and joy) in your lives.
11/19/09
This essay will appear in next week’s Jewish Press. Generally, as per my arrangement with The Jewish Press, I do not post columns until the issue is on the newsstand. However, due to the nature and timeliness of this subject, The Jewish Press is permitting its release prior to publication as a public service.
Abuse Survivors; Please Do Not Suffer Alone
By: Dr. Benzion Twerski and Rabbi Yakov Horowitz
In recent days, reports have circulated in the media and on the Internet about the tragic early passing of yet another young man in our community. Those reports indicate that the trauma of childhood abuse followed him and complicated his adult life to the point that it impinged on the quality of his personal relationships.
It is not the intent of these lines to substantiate these reports nor is it to dismiss them. Rather, we wish to use the opportunity presented by this horrible calamity and the dialogue it has created on the internet and in the street to once again loudly and forcefully reiterate the message we have been projecting for many years to victims of abuse – “Please reach out for help and do not suffer alone.”
For even in the event that the facts as reported in this particular tragedy are not accurate, they are most certainly consistent with the pattern we have unfortunately seen over and over again, where victims of childhood abuse go through unspeakable agony as they attempt to singlehandedly deal with the toxic aftereffects of the trauma they suffered in their formative years. We have each encountered numerous instances where untreated childhood abuse follows victims into adulthood, shredding their marriages and rendering them often incapable of entering into a loving and intimate relationship with their spouses until a trained mental health professional helps them sort things out. We have each been involved with more than a few childhood abuse victims who became addicted to heroin and/or cocaine, in an unsuccessful attempt to wash away the searing pain of their trauma. We have each paid more than a few shiva calls to families of abuse victims, who years and even decades later took their own lives.
There are a number of reasons why abuse victims would not avail themselves of intervention and assistance. Some are understandably reluctant or frightened to share the facts of their abuse with others. Others, who did have the courage to confide in adults in their lives were encouraged or intimidated into remaining silent – especially if the perpetrator is a respected individual or a close family member. This sends a horrible message to the victim – that he or she has done something that cannot see the light of day. The result is a that a never-ending video loop now plays in the mind of the victim, as societal pressure abuses them again and again, by forcing them to remain silent and unsupported.
There are many events that simultaneously involve more than one “system.” For example, when one gets arrested for driving under the influence which caused injuries or death, there are criminal penalties for drunk driving and financial reparations due for the damages caused. However, neither of these tracks deals with the fact that the perpetrator has a drinking problem. Courts realize they cannot treat alcoholism, as revoking licenses, impounding cars, and even jail terms will not prevent recidivism – especially if treatment is warranted but not followed.
Various efforts have been undertaken in recent years – all of which are necessary – in the arenas of prevention, education, training, and the need for reporting. And we both have proudly participated in many of them. However, despite the fact that these initiatives and the awareness they generate are often soothing to past abuse victims, none of these help them regain their footing. Only therapy by a licensed and trained professional can accomplish that.
We are therefore reaching out to anyone who was ever abused or molested in their childhood years and begging you to please do yourself the ultimate favor and get help.
Therapy may not solve all issues in your life, but it will do much to make your future brighter and filled with greater promise. In fact, many survivors thrive and build beautiful lives for themselves and their families following successful treatment.
It may be true that some people are resilient and survive with little apparent damage (apparent is the operative word). However, this is not the norm, and with the dangers involved, we would not recommend that you even risk this small chance. So; for your sake, and for the sake of your spouse and children, please, please get help.
This may mean several things:
Contact a mental health professional who is experienced in counseling trauma victims. (I strongly feel that well-intentioned individuals like me, who do not have professional training in abuse treatment, are not equipped to deal with these issues and should limit our involvement to supporting the efforts of the professionals, and steering those who seek our guidance in these matters directly to them. Y.H.)
Get information about trauma and its effects.
Connect with other victims/survivors. The camaraderie and support are invaluable.
We strongly suggest that you ignore those who inform you, that getting married and starting a family will help you, “Get over it.” Experience has taught us that it will often complicate things rather than heal them.
Please, please do not suffer alone. Reach out for help today.
In closing, we offer you our sincere and heartfelt bracha that Hashem grant you menuchas hanefesh and simchas hachayim (tranquility and joy) in your lives.
Rav Elyashiv (or his Kanoim) Got it Right
It appears that a compromise has been reached in the Intel fiasco and Intel has agreed to hire only non Jewish workers in their plant on shabbos, a plant that has been operating on shabbos for the last 24 years. Problem solved, no chillul shabbos, all are happy. Right? WRONG! This compromise is not good enough for the head of the Eidah Hacharedus, Rav Tuvia Weiss. Not only has he sent his thugs out to protest and will continue to do so, but now, according to a report on Yeshiva World, he is trying to bring pressure to Intel in America by requesting that the Undsdorfer Rebbe use his "influence" in the United States to meet with Intel execs in California to have them close the plant totally on shabbos. He said that until a compromise of "his liking" is reached he will continue with his antics by sending his thugs out to protest. This guy cannot be serious, on so many levels. First off he is greatly mistaken if he thinks some rebbe can just walk into the world headquarters over at Intel and request a meeting to make demands, they will laugh the guy out (then people like R' Pinkey Lipschutz and others wonder why charedim are painted in the media as being out of touch with reality) . Second if Intel has in good faith come to the table and compromised a deal which acceptable, what will the Eidah demand next of Intel (and by extension any company wishing to open in Israel)? Separate work areas for men and woman? Dress codes?
But this time there is a twist to the story. The Jerusalem Post is reporting that not only has Rav Elyashiv signed onto the deal but his kanoim are even considering sending people to protest in front of Rabbi Weiss' house. This could get interesting. Who will those who have been screaming that this is about companies not being open on shabbos now support? Will they stand by their principals and continue to protest because of the precedent that this may set, as they said, or will they now listen to their Gadol Hador Rav Elyashiv and not only stop protesting Intel but protest in front of Rabbi Weiss' house? What I would give to be in Israel this shabbos (for so many reasons), I am sure that if this takes place it will be a site to be seen. Who will throw the first punch?
As a charedi friend of mine pointed out to me last night, at a time when companies around the world are divesting itself from Israel and boycotting their products, is protesting a company that employs 6500 Israelis, including charedim, really the right thing to do? At what point do they walk outside their little worlds and see how our actions effect Jews not only in Israel but around the world? What kind of a message does this send to other companies that are interested in investing and doing business in Israel? As one commenter on VIN put it :"Intel has gone as far as it can go without shutting down the plant--which is really what the chareidi[m] want. They live in mortal fear that real job opportunities will be available to their bochurim who might, chas vachalilah go out and get a parnassah. As long as there are no jobs, they can continue sending their rabbonim to JFK every motzi shabbos for a week to beg money for their kehillah who are starving and lack sufficient funds to attend next week's demonstration. It is more important to keep these jobs and expand productive opportunities in EY than it is to capitulate to these absurd shabbos demands which even Elyashiv has said are no longer an issue once the workers are all goyim."
The Eidah and Rabbi Weiss thrive on these people being in poverty and being salves of the state. That is how they keep their power over them. To them the greatest threat is a thriving free thinking society where people can earn a living and think for themselves. Will there soon be a kol koreh from the Eidah banning Rav Elyashiv because he is too modernish?
But this time there is a twist to the story. The Jerusalem Post is reporting that not only has Rav Elyashiv signed onto the deal but his kanoim are even considering sending people to protest in front of Rabbi Weiss' house. This could get interesting. Who will those who have been screaming that this is about companies not being open on shabbos now support? Will they stand by their principals and continue to protest because of the precedent that this may set, as they said, or will they now listen to their Gadol Hador Rav Elyashiv and not only stop protesting Intel but protest in front of Rabbi Weiss' house? What I would give to be in Israel this shabbos (for so many reasons), I am sure that if this takes place it will be a site to be seen. Who will throw the first punch?
As a charedi friend of mine pointed out to me last night, at a time when companies around the world are divesting itself from Israel and boycotting their products, is protesting a company that employs 6500 Israelis, including charedim, really the right thing to do? At what point do they walk outside their little worlds and see how our actions effect Jews not only in Israel but around the world? What kind of a message does this send to other companies that are interested in investing and doing business in Israel? As one commenter on VIN put it :"Intel has gone as far as it can go without shutting down the plant--which is really what the chareidi[m] want. They live in mortal fear that real job opportunities will be available to their bochurim who might, chas vachalilah go out and get a parnassah. As long as there are no jobs, they can continue sending their rabbonim to JFK every motzi shabbos for a week to beg money for their kehillah who are starving and lack sufficient funds to attend next week's demonstration. It is more important to keep these jobs and expand productive opportunities in EY than it is to capitulate to these absurd shabbos demands which even Elyashiv has said are no longer an issue once the workers are all goyim."
The Eidah and Rabbi Weiss thrive on these people being in poverty and being salves of the state. That is how they keep their power over them. To them the greatest threat is a thriving free thinking society where people can earn a living and think for themselves. Will there soon be a kol koreh from the Eidah banning Rav Elyashiv because he is too modernish?
(photo courtesey of Gil Yohanan)
Please Tell the Truth Mr. Gordon
I was working on a post this morning about the deal that was reached with Intel and how it is playing out including a potential war between the Eida and Rav Elyashiv. I had a post ready to go but it has now been shelved because I saw this story on VIN. Last week when the puff piece on the Toldos Avraham Yitzchok Rebbe came out in The 5 Towns Jewish Times I said with certainty that this rebbe was giving Mr. Larry Gordon the answers he wanted to hear about his beliefs and followers so that he could raise as much money as he could then hit the road. Gordon went so far as to say that the rebbe told him that if it were not for chillul shabbos he would be on board with the Israeli Government. At the time I said this is nothing more than a lie being reported and I now feel vindicated because the rebbe’s own followers are saying that this is not true and the Rebbitzen who gave the interview said that not only did her husband not say many of the things attributed to him but they did not even know it was an interview. Here are some excerpts from the article that was written by some of the rebbe's followers and a follow up interview with the rebbitzen:
"We contacted the Rebbe’s wife, who told us as follows: 1) It was not the Rebbe who spoke to Gordon, only she. The Rebbe was present at the meeting but did not say anything. 2) The Rebbe and the Rebbitzen were not aware that this was an interview, much less with a Zionist newspaper. Had they known this, they would not have agreed to speak to Gordon, lest he misrepresent their views. They were under the impression that Gordon was just another one of hundreds who come to speak with the Rebbe. 3) She did not make the statement quoted in the article. She did speak against those demonstrators who throw stones, saying that the Rebbe was strongly opposed to that. On that point Gordon quoted her correctly. 4) The Rebbe has decided not to fight the newspaper for misquoting him, or to issue a denial, because these Zionists are impossible to deal with, and even a denial will not help."
"The Rebbe’s father and predecessor was Rabbi Avraham Yitzchok Kahn, known as the Toldos Aharon Rebbe. He passed away in 1996. Two years before the end of his life, he wrote in his book Igros Divrei Emunah (p. 225) that Zionism has become a worse sin in the eyes of G-d now that religious Jews have become the strongest Zionists. This places the entire Jewish people in danger. “As long as Zionism was a largely secular movement,” he said, “the defending angels in G-d’s court could at least say that the keepers of the Torah, the most important segment of the Jewish people, has nothing to do with this state that violates G-d’s decree of exile. But now that many religious Jews have begun to speak of Eretz Yisroel as if it is ours and it is forbidden to return it, thus aligning themselves with the Zionist ideal, the angels no longer have any defense, may Hashem have mercy.”
"The current Rebbe continues faithfully in their tradition. But last week, when he visited the Modern Orthodox community of Lawrence, New York, this tradition brought him into conflict with the local community members, most of whom are strong Zionists. As the Rebbe held a tish and spoke with individuals, some in Lawrence asked why they should give money to support an anti-Zionist community. The controversy was deepened by the perception that Toldos Avraham Yitzchok members were central players in the recent demonstrations in the streets of Jerusalem against a parking lot opened by the mayor on Shabbos."
"Quite understandably, Gordon set out to portray the Rebbe as a Zionist, whose only complaint is that the State of Israel is not religious enough. However, the way in which he went about it, using falsified quotations and his own specious arguments, does not reflect well on the reliability of his journalism. "
This Rebbe came to town and took your money while his followers laugh at you behind your back and mock your naiveté to possibly believe that it is only shabbos that separates the rebbe and his followers from the State. It is the State itself and Zionism as an entity that the rebbe and his followers view as "that Zionism has become a worse sin in the eyes of G-d now that religious Jews".
The question needs to be asked that if the rebbe is so principled that he would not take money from a woman who was mechalel shabbos how can he take money from a Zionistic community if we are, in fact, the worst thing to happen to the Jewish people ever?
Mr. Gordon, you and those who welcomed this rebbe with open arms and so freely gave him money have been played for fools. You can call these people extremists and propaganda artists but they are the rebbe's followers telling you exactly how they and their rebbe feel. Perhaps next time a rabid anti Zionist comes to town to pick your pocket you will not be so quick to look important by painting him and his followers as Zionistic lovers of Israel whose values are so closely aligned with those of your community.
"We contacted the Rebbe’s wife, who told us as follows: 1) It was not the Rebbe who spoke to Gordon, only she. The Rebbe was present at the meeting but did not say anything. 2) The Rebbe and the Rebbitzen were not aware that this was an interview, much less with a Zionist newspaper. Had they known this, they would not have agreed to speak to Gordon, lest he misrepresent their views. They were under the impression that Gordon was just another one of hundreds who come to speak with the Rebbe. 3) She did not make the statement quoted in the article. She did speak against those demonstrators who throw stones, saying that the Rebbe was strongly opposed to that. On that point Gordon quoted her correctly. 4) The Rebbe has decided not to fight the newspaper for misquoting him, or to issue a denial, because these Zionists are impossible to deal with, and even a denial will not help."
"The Rebbe’s father and predecessor was Rabbi Avraham Yitzchok Kahn, known as the Toldos Aharon Rebbe. He passed away in 1996. Two years before the end of his life, he wrote in his book Igros Divrei Emunah (p. 225) that Zionism has become a worse sin in the eyes of G-d now that religious Jews have become the strongest Zionists. This places the entire Jewish people in danger. “As long as Zionism was a largely secular movement,” he said, “the defending angels in G-d’s court could at least say that the keepers of the Torah, the most important segment of the Jewish people, has nothing to do with this state that violates G-d’s decree of exile. But now that many religious Jews have begun to speak of Eretz Yisroel as if it is ours and it is forbidden to return it, thus aligning themselves with the Zionist ideal, the angels no longer have any defense, may Hashem have mercy.”
"The current Rebbe continues faithfully in their tradition. But last week, when he visited the Modern Orthodox community of Lawrence, New York, this tradition brought him into conflict with the local community members, most of whom are strong Zionists. As the Rebbe held a tish and spoke with individuals, some in Lawrence asked why they should give money to support an anti-Zionist community. The controversy was deepened by the perception that Toldos Avraham Yitzchok members were central players in the recent demonstrations in the streets of Jerusalem against a parking lot opened by the mayor on Shabbos."
"Quite understandably, Gordon set out to portray the Rebbe as a Zionist, whose only complaint is that the State of Israel is not religious enough. However, the way in which he went about it, using falsified quotations and his own specious arguments, does not reflect well on the reliability of his journalism. "
This Rebbe came to town and took your money while his followers laugh at you behind your back and mock your naiveté to possibly believe that it is only shabbos that separates the rebbe and his followers from the State. It is the State itself and Zionism as an entity that the rebbe and his followers view as "that Zionism has become a worse sin in the eyes of G-d now that religious Jews".
The question needs to be asked that if the rebbe is so principled that he would not take money from a woman who was mechalel shabbos how can he take money from a Zionistic community if we are, in fact, the worst thing to happen to the Jewish people ever?
Mr. Gordon, you and those who welcomed this rebbe with open arms and so freely gave him money have been played for fools. You can call these people extremists and propaganda artists but they are the rebbe's followers telling you exactly how they and their rebbe feel. Perhaps next time a rabid anti Zionist comes to town to pick your pocket you will not be so quick to look important by painting him and his followers as Zionistic lovers of Israel whose values are so closely aligned with those of your community.
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Let Us Better Educate Our Children
The Orthodox community is doing a very poor job in preparing young people for marriage. It is blatantly evident in the recent story of the boy in Brooklyn who supposedly killed himself 2 days after his wedding. I am not going to speculate on facts or give any credence to rumors that are abound in the press and on this internet, but I do think that this is a good opportunity to discuss premarital issues as they relate to our community and how we deal with certain topics such as finances, relationships, children and of course the 800 pound gorilla in the room, sex.
In the Catholic comuunity, prior to a couple getting married they are required to go through Pre-Cana. What it is, is pre marriage counseling dealing with many issues such as compatibility, finances, conflict resolution, sexuality and other topics. Often it is done in groups however sometimes it is done individually. This gives couples the opportunity to discuss issues that may come up see how the other will respond to certain situations and it forces couples to discuss topics that they might feel uncomfortable discussing were they not forced to. Our community spends weeks preparing the couple in separate chasan and kallah classes teaching every aspect and possible law and scenario of hilchos niddah and then we are given a chasan schmoose and sent on our merry way. We are not being prepared to deal with broader issues and as a result, you are now hearing more and more about young people getting divorced and unfortunately worse.
In our community kids are not taught about finances as they relate to marriage, young couples are often getting married in college, not being given heterim for birth control and 9 months after the wedding when the chasan and kallah still barely know each other they have a baby often with no way to support themselves other than with handouts from their parents. In the charedi community it is worse because where as in our community we date for longer periods of time and most often the man will get a job within the first few years of marriage, in the charedi community they date for 5 or 6 weeks, are engaged for 2-3 months, during which time their interaction is often limited and within 9 months they have a kid all while the husband is still learning in kollel for the foreseeable future. Rarely are household finances discussed and other relationship topics or important pieces of information are hidden and brushed under the carpet in fear of ruining the shidduch. If something needs to be hidden in fear of ruining a shidduch perhaps the shidduch is not good to begin with. If two people cannot discuss issues that are most important to them before they get married how are they expected to discuss them after they are married and have kids? These young people need to be given time to get to know each other which starts with allowing them to date for and be engaged for longer periods of time. It also means that it is time that stigmas and yichus are taken out of the shidduch equation and families and young people are allowed to be open with each other and discuss topics and things that effect marriages and relationships. These young people need time to get to know each other better and see if they are truly compatible which brings me to the topic of sex.
Our community (often in the MO community depending on school and teachers but certainly in the charedi community) teach that boys and girls are assur to each other. You can't talk to each other, be friends with each other look at each other and G-d forbid should you touch each other you are doomed. Then all of a sudden a boy and girl and thrown into a room together and told to consummate their marriage with often little instruction. The kallah is generally not told anything and the guy is given cryptic instructions by a chasan teacher which best case scenario leads to some confusion on the night of the wedding, worst case scenario leads him to the internet to find out what it is he is supposed to be doing and when it does not live up to what he thinks it should be, he is let down right away. The anxiety to perform often leads to problems the first time and the chasan and kallah are not taught what to do in those situations. We need to do a much better job in education kids in the topic of sexuality. There is a new book that was recently published in our community that begins to address this topic. Sarah Diament wrote a book called Torah Parenting: Talking to your Children about Intimacy. This book has haskamos from Rav Willig, Rav Schachter and Rabbi Abraham J Twersky. I have not yet purchased the book (I am waiting for the seforim sale) but according to the website, "Sara Diament, M.A., has written an Orthodox Jewish parenting guide for talking to children about intimacy and sex from a Torah perspective. In a conversational manner and with sensitivity, she provides user-friendly guidance on understanding the Jewish view of intimacy and addresses the questions that parents have when broaching this topic with their children and teenagers. With recommendations on how to overcome discomfort and effectively engage children throughout childhood and adolescence, this guide is the perfect resource for parents who are seeking religiously appropriate advice and information."
In the Catholic comuunity, prior to a couple getting married they are required to go through Pre-Cana. What it is, is pre marriage counseling dealing with many issues such as compatibility, finances, conflict resolution, sexuality and other topics. Often it is done in groups however sometimes it is done individually. This gives couples the opportunity to discuss issues that may come up see how the other will respond to certain situations and it forces couples to discuss topics that they might feel uncomfortable discussing were they not forced to. Our community spends weeks preparing the couple in separate chasan and kallah classes teaching every aspect and possible law and scenario of hilchos niddah and then we are given a chasan schmoose and sent on our merry way. We are not being prepared to deal with broader issues and as a result, you are now hearing more and more about young people getting divorced and unfortunately worse.
In our community kids are not taught about finances as they relate to marriage, young couples are often getting married in college, not being given heterim for birth control and 9 months after the wedding when the chasan and kallah still barely know each other they have a baby often with no way to support themselves other than with handouts from their parents. In the charedi community it is worse because where as in our community we date for longer periods of time and most often the man will get a job within the first few years of marriage, in the charedi community they date for 5 or 6 weeks, are engaged for 2-3 months, during which time their interaction is often limited and within 9 months they have a kid all while the husband is still learning in kollel for the foreseeable future. Rarely are household finances discussed and other relationship topics or important pieces of information are hidden and brushed under the carpet in fear of ruining the shidduch. If something needs to be hidden in fear of ruining a shidduch perhaps the shidduch is not good to begin with. If two people cannot discuss issues that are most important to them before they get married how are they expected to discuss them after they are married and have kids? These young people need to be given time to get to know each other which starts with allowing them to date for and be engaged for longer periods of time. It also means that it is time that stigmas and yichus are taken out of the shidduch equation and families and young people are allowed to be open with each other and discuss topics and things that effect marriages and relationships. These young people need time to get to know each other better and see if they are truly compatible which brings me to the topic of sex.
Our community (often in the MO community depending on school and teachers but certainly in the charedi community) teach that boys and girls are assur to each other. You can't talk to each other, be friends with each other look at each other and G-d forbid should you touch each other you are doomed. Then all of a sudden a boy and girl and thrown into a room together and told to consummate their marriage with often little instruction. The kallah is generally not told anything and the guy is given cryptic instructions by a chasan teacher which best case scenario leads to some confusion on the night of the wedding, worst case scenario leads him to the internet to find out what it is he is supposed to be doing and when it does not live up to what he thinks it should be, he is let down right away. The anxiety to perform often leads to problems the first time and the chasan and kallah are not taught what to do in those situations. We need to do a much better job in education kids in the topic of sexuality. There is a new book that was recently published in our community that begins to address this topic. Sarah Diament wrote a book called Torah Parenting: Talking to your Children about Intimacy. This book has haskamos from Rav Willig, Rav Schachter and Rabbi Abraham J Twersky. I have not yet purchased the book (I am waiting for the seforim sale) but according to the website, "Sara Diament, M.A., has written an Orthodox Jewish parenting guide for talking to children about intimacy and sex from a Torah perspective. In a conversational manner and with sensitivity, she provides user-friendly guidance on understanding the Jewish view of intimacy and addresses the questions that parents have when broaching this topic with their children and teenagers. With recommendations on how to overcome discomfort and effectively engage children throughout childhood and adolescence, this guide is the perfect resource for parents who are seeking religiously appropriate advice and information."
It is a very good thing that the conversation is stating to happen. For too long we have looked at these topics as being taboo and totally off limits but we now live in an time where if your parents or teachers are not going to talk to you about this, the answers are 2 clicks away and those answers do not fit in with a torah perspective. Rabbi Twerskey went so far in his haskamah to say that "To avoid dealing with these issues under the guise of tznius falls under the category of chossid shoteh, false piety". Gil interviewed the author on Hirhurim a number of weeks ago.
I think that given that people are getting married younger and younger the topic of birth control needs to be re-looked at on a broader basis, not a situational basis. I understand the reasons for Negiah and gedarim but this is something that needs to be discussed openly as well not just tell these kids that they are doomed to hell. There are many other marriage and relationship topics that need to be re-looked by our community. Hopefully this book will be the first step in getting the conversation started, and this tragic incident will lead to more open discussions in our community about marriage, commitment and relationships.Monday, November 16, 2009
Chevron Ir Avoteinu
Six months after the tragic Chevron Massacre in 1929 Rav Kook was invited to speak at an azkarah. Here is what he said:"The holy martyrs of Hebron do not need a memorial service. The Jewish people can never forget the holy and pure souls who were slaughtered by murderers and vile thugs.
Rather, we must remember and remind the Jewish people not to forget the city of the Patriarchs. The people must know what Hebron means to us.
We have a tradition that "The actions of the fathers are signposts for the children" [Nachmanides, Gen. 12:6]. When the weak-hearted spies arrived at Hebron, they were frightened by the fierce nations that lived in the land. But 'Caleb quieted the people for Moses. He said, 'We must go forth and occupy the land - we can do it!'' [Num. 13:30]
Despite this terrible tragedy that took place in Hebron, we announce to the world, "Our strength now is like our strength then." We will not abandon our holy places and aspirations. Hebron is the city of our fathers, the city of the Machpeilah cave where our Patriarchs are buried. It is the city of David, the cradle of our sovereign monarchy.
Those who discourage the ones trying to rebuild the Jewish community in Hebron with arguments of political expedience; those who scorn and say, 'What are those wretched Jews doing?'; those who refuse to help build Hebron - they are attacking the very roots of our people. In the future they will need to give account for their actions. If ruffians and hooligans have repaid our kindness with malice, we have only one eternal response: Jewish Hebron will once again be built, in honor and glory!
The inner meaning of Hebron is to draw strength and galvanize ourselves with the power of Netzach Yisrael, Eternal Israel.
That proud Jew, Caleb, announced years later, "I am still strong... as my strength was then, so is my strength now" [Joshua 14:11]. So too, we announce to all: our strength now is as our strength was then. We shall reestablish Hebron in even greater glory, with peace and security for every Jew. With God's help, we will merit to see Hebron completely rebuilt, speedily in our days."
This past shabbos we read about how Avraham bought the Me'ars Hamachpelah from Efron. Tens of thousands of Jews from around the world converged on the holy city to spend shabbos at kivrei Avos. There is no dispute, this land always has and always will belong to the Jews. I have spent shabbos in Chevron at the home of my good friend Rav Simcha Hochbaum and the feeling one experiences when spending shabbos there is unbelievable. The people living thee are truly inspirational and have a simchas hachaim that cannot be duplicated. These people are moser nefesh so that the Jewish people can hold on to and show our sovereignty over land that is rightfully ours.
Rav Kooks dream of having this holy city once again populated is now being realized everyday. The way we answer the call and Bracha of finally having a Jewish homeland after 2000 years in galus is to continue to populate areas and stay firm where we are. No pressure is enough from any world leader whether George Bush or Barak Hussein Obama to get Israel to give up parts of Yerushalayim. And if there is a need to give the Arabs land in which to live, like Gaza, let us make sure that we know what we are getting in return and let us also learn from our mistakes and never again uproot a Jew from his or her home!
Yaasher kochachem to those who went to Chevron for this past shabbos but even more so to those who are moser nefer for klal yisrael on a daily basis by choosing to live in ir avoseinu.
"If ruffians and hooligans have repaid our kindness with malice, we have only one eternal response: Jewish Hebron will once again be built, in honor and glory!"
Baruch Hashem we are once again in a position to declare that Chevron has been rebuilt in honor and glory.
Saturday, November 14, 2009
GET A JOB
These fools are at it again. Those protesting supposedly for kavod shabbos were out in droves today protesting the Intel plant in Yerushalayim that is allowing people to work on shabbos. Intel attempted to compromise by only allowing non-Jews to work but this was not good for those planning the protests, including Knesset member MK Uri Maklev (UTJ) who rejected the suggestion. Although only "peaceful" protests were called for there were around 300 arrested a number of people arrested for throwing stones and attacking reporters. I say the people at Intel should give these thugs a taste of their own medicine and throw rocks at them. What do these clowns at the Eidah think is going to happen when they call for "peaceful" protests? That people out rioting are going to behave themselves.
Intel employs 6500 people in Israel and is now considering shutting down their operations due to these thugs protesting. Will these naves consider that a victory? 6500 Israelis losing their jobs? Most of these people do not work and do not contribute A THING to the country, I don't buy the argument that they sit and learn and that is their contribution because there are plenty of guys sitting and learning in Hesder that seem to be able to accomplish both. And now these people are driving industry, tax revenue and jobs out of the country. Perhaps these ingrates do not know what it means to lose a job because they do not work but it's not good. Perhaps they do not realize the ramifications of major tax revenue leaving the country because all they do is take but it just means less money, and free services for them. Maybe the government should sponsor protests outside these peoples houses on Sunday through Friday to protest the fact that they refuse to work. They don't work 6 days a week and want no one to work on the 7th, even non- Jews. Chillul shabbos is a terrible thing but chillul hashem is worse.
It is no wonder 80% of Israeli businesses do not want to hire charedim. Would you want to hire people that are then going to come and protest you? I say take names and cut off welfare funds from any of these people who come out to protest. These things need to stop and these thugs need to find something productive to do with their time.
Intel employs 6500 people in Israel and is now considering shutting down their operations due to these thugs protesting. Will these naves consider that a victory? 6500 Israelis losing their jobs? Most of these people do not work and do not contribute A THING to the country, I don't buy the argument that they sit and learn and that is their contribution because there are plenty of guys sitting and learning in Hesder that seem to be able to accomplish both. And now these people are driving industry, tax revenue and jobs out of the country. Perhaps these ingrates do not know what it means to lose a job because they do not work but it's not good. Perhaps they do not realize the ramifications of major tax revenue leaving the country because all they do is take but it just means less money, and free services for them. Maybe the government should sponsor protests outside these peoples houses on Sunday through Friday to protest the fact that they refuse to work. They don't work 6 days a week and want no one to work on the 7th, even non- Jews. Chillul shabbos is a terrible thing but chillul hashem is worse.
It is no wonder 80% of Israeli businesses do not want to hire charedim. Would you want to hire people that are then going to come and protest you? I say take names and cut off welfare funds from any of these people who come out to protest. These things need to stop and these thugs need to find something productive to do with their time.
(photo courtesy of Kikar.net)
Friday, November 13, 2009
Where is Your Emunah?
What happens to our emunah when we do not get the outcome we desire? Well of course we blame it on the evil anti Semitic government and label the outcome a "Blood Libel". I am not sure how I feel about the outcome of the Rubashkin trial. On the one hand I always feel bad when I see a Jew being taken away in handcuffs and found guilty of a crime. On the other hand he committed crimes, was found guilty, rejected a plea deal and is now going to go to jail. He and his people had mass tehilim rallies and now that the verdict was handed down these chareds are calling it a blood libel.
Why can this not be realized as G-d's will as would have been a not guilty verdict? He did, after all, reject the plea deal. I am reminded of the story of the man in the flood who was sent a raft, then a boat then a helicopter and every time declared that he believe in G-d and he would be saved. When he gets up to heaven he asks G-d why he wasn't saved and G-d said what do you mean, I sent you a raft a boat and a helicopter. I believe that the plea deal was the last hope Rubashkin had for not spending the rest of his life in prison.
His entire defense was based on trying to show him as a negligent business owner who, although committed crimes, did not do it knowingly but only did them out of sloppiness. This is a telling quote from the NY Times article on the case: "Mr. Cook [Rubashkin's attorney] said Mr. Rubashkin might have practiced business unethically but never committed a crime." I don't even know what that means. Did he or did he not falsify loan documents? Did he or did he not forge immigration cards? We are supposed to believe, according to his attorney, that although he did these things he did not think he was committing a crime? If that is the case what was he doing running a multi million dollar corporation to begin with. They claim he "never read the loan agreement with First Bank and tried to portray Mr. Rubashkin as a bumbling businessman who was in over his head." I am no defense attorney but what the heck kind of defense is that? He didn't read the documents he was signing? He didn't realize that he could not falsify financial statements and that he had to pay back the loan?
I personally feel for this guy and his family now that he will most likely be spending the rest of his life in prison (although Kupat Ha'Ir will now have a new go to person to use to raise money) but if he could not handle the responsibility of running a company he should have stepped down instead of committing fraud.
We need to take a good long hard look at this verdict and use it as a model to teach our children about personal responsibility and business ethics. I am not disputing the fact that Mr. Rubashkin and his family are huge baalei tzedaka and have done a tremendous amount of chessed within the frum community, I met his father Aaron a few years ago and some of the stories he was telling me were unbelievable, but at the end of the day the man committed some serous crimes and he could be the greatest guy in the world, he broke the law and is now going to jail. To call this a blood libel and say he was only targeted because he was Jewish is simply disingenuous. If we Jews are aware that we are more heavily scrutinized because of our religion and people tend to look at our businesses first, isn't that all the more reason that we need to make sure that everything we are doing is K'daas U' K'din according to dina d' malchusa? This can be used as a model and teaching moment for our kids. Teach them that we are held to a higher standard in business and we are going to be more heavily scrutinized in our dealings and it is for that reason that we must do everything according to the law and not try any "yeshivishe shticklach" to get around it. A verdict was handed down and maybe this is G-d's way of telling our community that it is time to clean up our act. The teffilos of those davening for Mr. Rubashkin were answered and the answer is loud and clear, don't break the law and you will not go to jail, but if you do please realize that there are consequences to your actions.
Why can this not be realized as G-d's will as would have been a not guilty verdict? He did, after all, reject the plea deal. I am reminded of the story of the man in the flood who was sent a raft, then a boat then a helicopter and every time declared that he believe in G-d and he would be saved. When he gets up to heaven he asks G-d why he wasn't saved and G-d said what do you mean, I sent you a raft a boat and a helicopter. I believe that the plea deal was the last hope Rubashkin had for not spending the rest of his life in prison.
His entire defense was based on trying to show him as a negligent business owner who, although committed crimes, did not do it knowingly but only did them out of sloppiness. This is a telling quote from the NY Times article on the case: "Mr. Cook [Rubashkin's attorney] said Mr. Rubashkin might have practiced business unethically but never committed a crime." I don't even know what that means. Did he or did he not falsify loan documents? Did he or did he not forge immigration cards? We are supposed to believe, according to his attorney, that although he did these things he did not think he was committing a crime? If that is the case what was he doing running a multi million dollar corporation to begin with. They claim he "never read the loan agreement with First Bank and tried to portray Mr. Rubashkin as a bumbling businessman who was in over his head." I am no defense attorney but what the heck kind of defense is that? He didn't read the documents he was signing? He didn't realize that he could not falsify financial statements and that he had to pay back the loan?
I personally feel for this guy and his family now that he will most likely be spending the rest of his life in prison (although Kupat Ha'Ir will now have a new go to person to use to raise money) but if he could not handle the responsibility of running a company he should have stepped down instead of committing fraud.
We need to take a good long hard look at this verdict and use it as a model to teach our children about personal responsibility and business ethics. I am not disputing the fact that Mr. Rubashkin and his family are huge baalei tzedaka and have done a tremendous amount of chessed within the frum community, I met his father Aaron a few years ago and some of the stories he was telling me were unbelievable, but at the end of the day the man committed some serous crimes and he could be the greatest guy in the world, he broke the law and is now going to jail. To call this a blood libel and say he was only targeted because he was Jewish is simply disingenuous. If we Jews are aware that we are more heavily scrutinized because of our religion and people tend to look at our businesses first, isn't that all the more reason that we need to make sure that everything we are doing is K'daas U' K'din according to dina d' malchusa? This can be used as a model and teaching moment for our kids. Teach them that we are held to a higher standard in business and we are going to be more heavily scrutinized in our dealings and it is for that reason that we must do everything according to the law and not try any "yeshivishe shticklach" to get around it. A verdict was handed down and maybe this is G-d's way of telling our community that it is time to clean up our act. The teffilos of those davening for Mr. Rubashkin were answered and the answer is loud and clear, don't break the law and you will not go to jail, but if you do please realize that there are consequences to your actions.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
GO HOME!
A number of years ago the Sverer Rebbe came to the 5 Towns for a week. He gave a big tisch on Friday night and shabbos at shaloshudis and spent the week visiting the local shuls and yeshivos and welcoming visitors. At the end of the week the rebbe left with around $2 Million in donations and dedications for his yeshiva and mosdos. By all accounts this trip was a success.
As I posted about last week, this past shabbos the Toldos Avrohom Yitzchok Rebbe came to Lawrence for shabbos and was given the royal treatment as well with a tisch being hosted in Shaaray Tefilah and being available to welcome visitors for a few days. It is being reported on Dov Bear that at the end of the day the rebbe was only able to raise $50,000. By all accounts this trip was a flop for the rebbe and it proves that the good people of the 5 Towns still have some sechel. Here we have, arguably one of the, if not the, wealthiest Jewish communities in the country and a rebbe who is being billed as a great tzadik and talmid chochom comes to a town that in the past has sent people home with millions of dollars he could have at least expected to raise a few hundred thousand but the people did not buy it this time. I also figure that a good amount of the $50,000 came from the host. It might be a great kavod to host a rebbe in your town and house but at least the people in this town did not, for the most part, sell their souls for the opportunity to feel important.
There is a sensational propoganda piece on the visit in the 5 Towns Jewish Times (which I labeled years ago nothing other than a charedi rag similar to Hamodia and Yated). In this piece the editor sat down and interviewed the rebbe about his visit. Now the first thing that must be remembered when reading this thing is that this guy is here to raise money and will say what he needs to to get to that goal. The rebbe claims that the only thing they don't like about the State of Israel is the chillul shabbos, “What it comes down to, very briefly, is that the government violates Shabbos and sanctions this desecration,” the Rebbe said clearly and calmly in Yiddish. “If there would not be this violation of Shabbos, we would have absolutely no problem with the State of Israel.” Simply put this is false and a lie. What about the shalosh sh'vuos that we are not allowed to have a Jewish homeland until Moshiach comes. The rebbitzen then claims that “even the Rebbe goes outside and protests by declaring three or four times in a raised voice ‘Shabbos,’ but then he goes back inside to his study and goes about his business,” and she declared that “The people you see in the streets rioting are bums”. I do give him credit for allowing his wife to give an interview, something that he would never allow her to do in Israel. I would also venture to say that any women in his sect who would speak on the record would meet the wrath of the tznius police which brings me to my next point.
I have been reading for the last week in this publication and others how the rebbe condemns those using violence and those holding protests and in this article he even claims that "he does not advocate or encourage getting involved in those types of activities, and that he bans any individual who does participate from entering his shul in Jerusalem". This is simply untrue. By the rebbitzen's own words the rebbe encourages these types of activities by going "outside and protests by declaring three or four times in a raised voice ‘Shabbos,’". He also has followers who are members of the mishmeres ha tznius that beat up women for not following their tznius guidelines. His answer, as well as those of his defenders has been that, "it is only a small group and he cannot control them". He can control them he just chooses not to. Of course Mayer Fertig’s article was attacked as "the need of some to sensationalize, dramatize, and exaggerate a situation that has only a minimal resemblance to reality". There were no exaggerations that had a minimal resemblance to reality. Everything written by Mayer, myself, Dov Bear, Harry and others were all reality. This guy leads a group of people that include rioting thugs and bums and he has no control over them. He is not a great man we should be looking up to. He saw the 5 Towns and Lawrence as an easy mark to go and raise money from people who like to feel important by hosting rebbes but in fact his trip was a failure and the good people of the 5 Towns did not open up their wallets to this man. Our community is facing a time of unprecedented financial strains and we can't pay our yeshivos and these people told this rebbe to find somewhere else to raise money because you and your hashkafos are not welcome in our town. You and your followers despise our way of life and given the chance your thugs would beat up our women for the way they dress yet you have no problem taking our scarce resources?
The most disturbing part of the article however was where this guy doing the interview, Mr. Larry Gordon, suggested that the rebbe launder government funds that he would not take due to their chillul shabbos through America:
"One area in which this is played out is in chinuch—the education system. This sect, as well as others, refuses to take money from Israel’s Education Ministry for their schools, because they do not want their Torah studies financed by a government that openly and deliberately violates Shabbos. Therefore, their institutions are seriously in debt. And that’s why they are in New York now, to raise money for the considerable education system that they administer.
I suggested to the Rebbe that since he was here in New York seeking vital funding for his educational institutions, perhaps we could arrange for the Israeli government to send us—here in the Diaspora—the money, and then we could in turn give it to his organization. The Rebbe said, with a smile, that it sounded like a good idea, but they have not yet encountered a person who can successfully effectuate that type of arrangement."
Mr. Gordon, did we learn nothing from the Spinke Rebbe, from Deal, from all the other Orthodox criminals that have been arrested recently for financial crimes and laundering that you have the gall to suggest publicly to this rebbe that he find a way to "kasher" his government money by having it flow through different sources? You want to talk about sensational journalism, you are suggesting this rebbe commit fraud against the State of Israel, you should be ashamed of yourself. Even meant as a joke it is simply not funny and not something that should be seen as a joke.
This rebbe may be passionate about the sanctity of shabbos but at what cost? Chillul hashem? Shefichas domim? How far will he and his thugs go to supposedly protect the "sanctity of shabbos" which is only being used as an excuse to get everyone in Israel to capitulate to his way of life and live under his Taliban standards. This is not the type of person that we should be welcoming into our community and sharing our resources with.
As I posted about last week, this past shabbos the Toldos Avrohom Yitzchok Rebbe came to Lawrence for shabbos and was given the royal treatment as well with a tisch being hosted in Shaaray Tefilah and being available to welcome visitors for a few days. It is being reported on Dov Bear that at the end of the day the rebbe was only able to raise $50,000. By all accounts this trip was a flop for the rebbe and it proves that the good people of the 5 Towns still have some sechel. Here we have, arguably one of the, if not the, wealthiest Jewish communities in the country and a rebbe who is being billed as a great tzadik and talmid chochom comes to a town that in the past has sent people home with millions of dollars he could have at least expected to raise a few hundred thousand but the people did not buy it this time. I also figure that a good amount of the $50,000 came from the host. It might be a great kavod to host a rebbe in your town and house but at least the people in this town did not, for the most part, sell their souls for the opportunity to feel important.
There is a sensational propoganda piece on the visit in the 5 Towns Jewish Times (which I labeled years ago nothing other than a charedi rag similar to Hamodia and Yated). In this piece the editor sat down and interviewed the rebbe about his visit. Now the first thing that must be remembered when reading this thing is that this guy is here to raise money and will say what he needs to to get to that goal. The rebbe claims that the only thing they don't like about the State of Israel is the chillul shabbos, “What it comes down to, very briefly, is that the government violates Shabbos and sanctions this desecration,” the Rebbe said clearly and calmly in Yiddish. “If there would not be this violation of Shabbos, we would have absolutely no problem with the State of Israel.” Simply put this is false and a lie. What about the shalosh sh'vuos that we are not allowed to have a Jewish homeland until Moshiach comes. The rebbitzen then claims that “even the Rebbe goes outside and protests by declaring three or four times in a raised voice ‘Shabbos,’ but then he goes back inside to his study and goes about his business,” and she declared that “The people you see in the streets rioting are bums”. I do give him credit for allowing his wife to give an interview, something that he would never allow her to do in Israel. I would also venture to say that any women in his sect who would speak on the record would meet the wrath of the tznius police which brings me to my next point.
I have been reading for the last week in this publication and others how the rebbe condemns those using violence and those holding protests and in this article he even claims that "he does not advocate or encourage getting involved in those types of activities, and that he bans any individual who does participate from entering his shul in Jerusalem". This is simply untrue. By the rebbitzen's own words the rebbe encourages these types of activities by going "outside and protests by declaring three or four times in a raised voice ‘Shabbos,’". He also has followers who are members of the mishmeres ha tznius that beat up women for not following their tznius guidelines. His answer, as well as those of his defenders has been that, "it is only a small group and he cannot control them". He can control them he just chooses not to. Of course Mayer Fertig’s article was attacked as "the need of some to sensationalize, dramatize, and exaggerate a situation that has only a minimal resemblance to reality". There were no exaggerations that had a minimal resemblance to reality. Everything written by Mayer, myself, Dov Bear, Harry and others were all reality. This guy leads a group of people that include rioting thugs and bums and he has no control over them. He is not a great man we should be looking up to. He saw the 5 Towns and Lawrence as an easy mark to go and raise money from people who like to feel important by hosting rebbes but in fact his trip was a failure and the good people of the 5 Towns did not open up their wallets to this man. Our community is facing a time of unprecedented financial strains and we can't pay our yeshivos and these people told this rebbe to find somewhere else to raise money because you and your hashkafos are not welcome in our town. You and your followers despise our way of life and given the chance your thugs would beat up our women for the way they dress yet you have no problem taking our scarce resources?
The most disturbing part of the article however was where this guy doing the interview, Mr. Larry Gordon, suggested that the rebbe launder government funds that he would not take due to their chillul shabbos through America:
"One area in which this is played out is in chinuch—the education system. This sect, as well as others, refuses to take money from Israel’s Education Ministry for their schools, because they do not want their Torah studies financed by a government that openly and deliberately violates Shabbos. Therefore, their institutions are seriously in debt. And that’s why they are in New York now, to raise money for the considerable education system that they administer.
I suggested to the Rebbe that since he was here in New York seeking vital funding for his educational institutions, perhaps we could arrange for the Israeli government to send us—here in the Diaspora—the money, and then we could in turn give it to his organization. The Rebbe said, with a smile, that it sounded like a good idea, but they have not yet encountered a person who can successfully effectuate that type of arrangement."
Mr. Gordon, did we learn nothing from the Spinke Rebbe, from Deal, from all the other Orthodox criminals that have been arrested recently for financial crimes and laundering that you have the gall to suggest publicly to this rebbe that he find a way to "kasher" his government money by having it flow through different sources? You want to talk about sensational journalism, you are suggesting this rebbe commit fraud against the State of Israel, you should be ashamed of yourself. Even meant as a joke it is simply not funny and not something that should be seen as a joke.
This rebbe may be passionate about the sanctity of shabbos but at what cost? Chillul hashem? Shefichas domim? How far will he and his thugs go to supposedly protect the "sanctity of shabbos" which is only being used as an excuse to get everyone in Israel to capitulate to his way of life and live under his Taliban standards. This is not the type of person that we should be welcoming into our community and sharing our resources with.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
