Kiruv on Ice

First I want to apologize to my dedicated fan base for my absence this week. I know many of you wait anxiously to read my words of wisdom and hang on every pearl that emanates from my keyboard, it's been a very busy week and I have not had a chance to post.

A number of days ago there was an essay on Matzav entitled "It's Time to Put Kiruv on Ice" where the writer urged people to stop donating to kiruv organizations. His basic premise was that in these tough financial times where yeshivos are closing and people can't afford to put food on their tables people need to prioritize tzedakos and the first one that should go are kiruv organizations because money should be staying in town. Now, while I agree that money should be staying in the communities this guys argument and reasoning is flawed, "Let’s be honest: the halachic basis for kiruv is questionable, and the success rate of kiruv is questionable as well." The halachic basis is questionable? Bringing people back to yahadus is questionable? Since Avraham avinu we have been bringing people closer to G-d but this guy questions the success rate and the "halachic basis" of kiruv. I don't think there is one frum person who does not know a baal tshuvah who's life, their family's life and even their community's life has not been positively affected by one of these kiruv organizations, whether it is NCSY, NJOP etc.

However, given the behavior of a few very high profile kiruv professionals of late, perhaps the writer is on to something. First there was the release of the sick tapes by Dovid Orlofsky and the subsequent apology that was not an apology because he has no regret and had he not been caught he would not have had any charatah for what he said. He has been making these crazy hateful statements to impressionable youth for years and has not once been held accountable for his actions, nor, sadly will he be. Then there was R' Amnon Yitzchak who felt it was his job to give malkus to a singer who performed in front of a mixed crowd. I recently made a siyum on Maakos and learned it pretty thoroughly and I do not recall this as one of the things that someone gets malkos for, but it might have been in a tosfos that I missed, it's a good excuse for chazarah, to find the place where it says someone singing Jewish Music to a mixed crowd deserves to get whipped. and as if this were not bad enough, a video surfaced showing him trying to manipulate Rav Shteinman into assering Jewish Music, perhaps he needs to give himself malkos for his mistreatment of the gedolim.

If this is what the kiruv movement has become I think that the Matzav writer has it right and these types of kiruv need to be put on ice and discontinued and cut off immediately. If this writer knew some of the baalei tshuva I know, I can guarantee you he would not be making this crazy suggestion, but he most likely only knows products of the likes of Rabbi Orlofsky or Amnon Yitzchok who have perverted the torah and the kiruv movement.

Local Kiddush Hashem

Updated below

With all the negative news permeating the news lately it is refreshing to see something very positive come out of our community. It is being reported on Matzav that over Shabbos Rabbi Yitzi Bald, a Jewish music composer and rebbe in South Shore Yeshiva saved a number of lives from a fire in Far Rockaway. Rabbi Bald was on his way to shul when he saw smoke coming out of a house, he was able to get a ladder and get two people to safety. He waited for the fire department to arrive and then went to shul.

A number of years ago Rav Aharon Lichtenstein shlita wrote an essay entitled "Centrist Orthodoxy, a Spiritual Accounting". Towards the end of the article he writes the following:

• A couple of years after we moved to Yerushalayim, I was once walking with my family in the Beit Yisrael neighborhood, where R. Isser Zalman Meltzer used to live. For the most part, it consists of narrow alleys. We came to a corner, and found a merchant stuck there with his car. The question came up as to how to help him; it was a clear case of perika u-te’ina (helping one load or unload his burden). There were some youngsters there from the neighborhood, who judging by their looks were probably ten or eleven years old. They saw that this merchant was not wearing a kippa. So they began a whole pilpul, based on the gemara in Pesachim (113b), about whether they should help him or not. They said, “If he walks around bareheaded, presumably he doesn’t separate terumot u-ma’asrot, so he is suspect of eating and selling untithed produce. . .”
  
  I wrote R. Soloveitchik a letter at that time, and told him of the incident. I ended with the comment, “Children of that age from our camp would not have known the gemara, but they would have helped him.” My feeling then was: Why, Ribbono shel Olam, must this be our choice? Can’t we find children who would have helped him and still know the gemara? Do we have to choose? I hope not; I believe not. If forced to choose, however, I would have no doubts where my loyalties lie: I prefer that they know less gemara, but help him.
  

I am sure that Rabbi Bald knows that gemorah and the great kiddush hashem of the story is that he stoped on shabbos on the way to shul and did what he had to to save those people. Rabbi Bald exemplifies the midos of a mentch and a ben torah. Yaasher Koach.

And … always and above all, daven to Hashem for siyata dishmaya

Rabbi Yaakov Horowitz has a great new article in the Jewish Star on keeping our kids on the derech. Have a good shabbos:

• One by one, people were filing in to a parenting class I was about to deliver a number of years ago. I was standing near the doorway, greeting them as they entered. On a whim, I randomly stopped a few attendees, introduced myself, and asked them what they were hoping to gain from the workshop.
  
  A charming twenty-something Chassidic fellow pushing a baby carriage containing a newborn child floored me with his response. “Rabbi,” he said, “My son is two months old. Just tell me what I should do so [that] he doesn’t go off the derech.” And he wasn’t kidding.
  
  That comment reflects the deepest fear that parents have nowadays – that their adorable child might c’has v’shalom (G-d forbid) morph into an unruly teenager who veers off the path (derech is Hebrew for path) to a successful life, abandons Yiddishkeit, and falls into a sub-culture of antisocial and self-destructive behavior.
  Truth be told, the question that young man posed is one I am often asked, albeit in less stark terms, due to my works with underachieving teens over the past thirty years. And while there certainly is no single correct answer to the question of why kids go “Off the Derech,” patterns of specific circumstances and parental behaviors are identifiable as significant risk factors for children to eventually join the ranks of the disenfranchised and dysfunctional.
  With that in mind, I decided to put pen to paper (or rather fingers to keyboard) and run a series of essays identifying things parents can do to give their children the very best chance to succeed in school and life. I will do my best to keep things positive and concentrate on practical advice rather than dwelling on the destructive behaviors that lead kids astray. Nevertheless, despite the gentle tone of these lines, keep in mind that the inverse of the items listed below are enormous risk factors for your kids. In other words, these essays are not wistful thinking of what the perfect home should look like, but rather a polite way of informing you of the terrible, often permanent damage that can occur when we ignore them.
  
  Please find below my list of “Ten Things Parents Can Do to Keep Their Children on the Derech,” listed in order of importance.
  
  In the weeks and months ahead, I intend to write at least one essay for each item below amplifying the theme and offering practical tips and suggestions. There is no doubt in my mind that I will amend and re-order this “Top Ten” list before the conclusion of this series of essays, and I hope it can serve as a springboard for reflection and discussion.
  
  I welcome your thoughts on these critical matters and it is my hope that these essays will help you raise your children so they grow to be proud, committed Jews who realize their fullest potential.
  
  “Top Ten Things Parents Can do to Keep Their Children on the Derech,”
  
  1. Belong to a kehila with a Rov who can guide you, and live spiritual, meaningful and inspired lives where you are true role models for your children.
  
  2. Create a happy and nurturing home environment; avoid corporal punishment and refrain from sending them to settings where it is condoned.
  
  3. Spend quality time and nurture your relationships with your children and seek help should you find yourself exuding negative energy with them.
  
  4. Be flexible – treat them as individuals and allow them to chart their own course in life.
  
  5. Protect them from abuse and molestation.
  
  6. Live in a forbearing community where the members have good Torah values and guide your children to develop friendships with peers who have good middos and share those values.
  
  7. Provide them with a good and broad-based education – in Judaic and general studies.
  
  8. “Stay in the Game” – never give up on them no matter how bumpy the road educationally or socially, and professionally identify and address any learning disabilities.
  
  9. See to it that your values and those of their schools are consistent and maintain congruence between your words and deeds.
  
  10. See that they exercise (very) often and have varied hobbies and interests.
  
  And … always and above all, daven to Hashem for siyata dishmaya.
  
  

A War On The Torah

"The "Ahavat Yisrael" school was established to answer the needs of a population that is haredi in behavior and Zionist in philosophical outlook. Its parent body believes in educating the children through the following principles:
I . A broad and deep knowledge of all limudei kodesh is vital, as is the internalization of all the values that stem from them.
Such values include mesirat nefesh in doing the mitzvot, loving Hashem, and honoring one’s parents as well as the concepts of self-discipline, patience and independence. "

Does this sound like a school that is "at war with the torah"? Some charedi Gedolie Yisrael apparently think so. There are kol korehs currently hanging in Yerushalayim calling for "Activists and public representatives" to "stand up to this breach, waging a holy war for pure education", in plain English they are calling for more violent protests and riots, this time against a Yeshiva that wants to move locations to Yerushalayim. According to these people, Ahavat Yisrael-Rapaport, with its emphasis on [secular] studies, which runs counter to the spirit of the age-old form of education handed down to us through our rabbonim. They also intend to add a chareidi “yeshiva high school,” which all gedolei Yisroel have opposed in the past, publishing their view, daas Torah, against these institutions, where foreign winds from within blow into the midst of the camp [of the faithful]. They are [now] scheming to come to the Ramot neighborhood, and to Ramot Alef in particularly, to ensnare the children of Ramot neighborhoods and turn them into victims". They say that such “shaatnez” schools by the “nationalist charedi” schools are assur and an affront to the torah true life and are calling for “a struggle to stave off the effort to import the foreign, unsuccessful form of education into the heart of the neighborhood.

What is most ironic about this is that many of the people who send their kids to Rappaport buy into this farce of daas torah, in fact one of the core things taught in Rappaport, as per their own description is"Middot, Pirkei Avot and Gedolei Yisrael:
Regular classes in these subjects help the students to identify with Torah giants and learn from their words, actions and entire lives. Schoolwide middos campaigns and community involvement encourage the practice of what is learned in theory. For example, this past year, we focused on: I try not to hurt others, I say thank you, speak nicely and help at home. The students also had activities with children form three special education ganim, such as learning together and having a joint Purim party with an exchange of mishloach manot."

So while this school is trying to teach respect for gedolim and other types of Jews, and to teach the kids to have midos, these same people who they are being taught to respect are standing up against them and declaring war because they claim that they don't represent so called "torah true" Judaism. The gedolim claim that they are like shaatnez and present a great danger to their wonderful way of life. A way of life which I guess they are so insecure with that they feel a need to hide and shun every other type of Orthodox Jew who does not look like them lest their children be tempted by this other brand.

This is indeed a war but a losing battle on both sides. These kanoim get bolder by the day banning and inciting and fighting and furthering the rift between religious communities, the other side, our side, sits back and takes it and ignores these attacks. We believe that we are better than that, we believe that by ignoring these attacks it makes is better people (which it might), but it also weakens us. The extreme charedim, while some claim small in number, are currently the public face of Judaism and when something they do makes the press it makes all Orthodox Jews who wear a yarmulkah in public look bad. From the school that is now one step away from being in the parent’s bedroom to the constant riots and protests in Eretz Yisrael that are now a daily occurrence. It is no wonder so many secular Israelis choose to remain not frum and even anti frum. What should their reaction be when this is the public face of Orthodoxy? If you were not frum and saw all this going on, would you want to be?

Rabbi Weinreb is a Great Manhig of Klal Yisrael

Rabbi Tzvi Hersh Weinreb is a great manhig of klal yisrael who has served the kahal for decades. Both in his position as a Rav as well as his role as head of the OU, he is truly someone our community should strive to emulate and learn from. He is a talmid chacham, with midos tovos, and genuine concern and love for klal Yisrael, he is the definition of a tzadik. I have personally had a number of involvements with him and there is not a bad word that can be said about him.

There are recordings that are posted on Failed Messiah, in which Dovid Orlofsky, a man who is choteh u machteh es harabim, is heard saying the vilest things about Rabbi Wienreb, things that boarder on nivul peh. A Rabbi in our community said that anyone who hears these recordings must tear kriah for the bizayon hatorah that has ensued (the rabbi gave me permission to use HIS name but I opted not to). The premise of the tape is that after the tzuami, Rabbi Weinreb was speaking with Manni Nissel, a man who much like Orlofsky, manipulates and brainwashes baalei tshuvos and seminary girls, and Rabbi Weinreb asked Nissel for some mekoros from which to speak about the event. I know this is probably hard for Orlofsky who has never held a real rabbinic position in his life to understand, but rabbonim speak to each other and always ask each other for makoros and divrei torah. Orlofsky, if you are such a big talmid chacham and know all of shas, what are you doing spewing your vitriol and hate at baalei tshuvos and impressionable seminary girls, why not do something useful and teach them torah? This sick speech was given at Ohr Hagola to people who were about to return to America to do kiruv and teach Judaism to people who have no connection to it, is this really the kind of hate you want them disseminating? When I heard the recordings this morning I was beside myself with both anger as well as bewilderment that such words could be uttered about a leader as great as Rabbi Weinreb.

Orlofsky spends his time trying to sell off his brand of Judaism as being genuine but the man is a joke, and acts like one. I have heard a number of classes that he has given and the only way he seems to know how to teach is through mocking, ridiculing, and making jokes out of serious matters. All he does is lower the level of discourse. Instead of having a rational argument he teaches people to simply mock the other person and takes any kind of respect out of the conversation. One no longer needs to formulate a thought but rather all the need to do is ridicule. If I were him I would buy myself a pair of pants with some pretty strong knees because it's a long way for you to crawl across the ocean to beg mechilah from Rabbi Weinreb.

Orlofsky says that the Modern Orthodox are not b'nei torah, if he is the measure of a ben torah I take that as a compliment. He teaches in both Ohr Sameach as well as Darchei Bina. Contact the administrators and those in charge there and tell him that you will not stand for such a bizayon hatorah. Don't send these places a dime and don't let Orlofsky into your community. Send this sick guy a message that he had better be careful who he insults because we will not take his sick hatred sitting down, but we will send him packing and not allow him to influence klal yisrael with his sick warped brand of whatever it is he is trying to pass off as Judaism.

Chanoch L' Naar Al Pi Darko

"When I learned in Lakewood, the only one who wore a black hat was Reb Aharon Kotler. Even the old mashgiach, Reb Nosson Wachtfogel, wouldn’t dare wear a black hat. No one wore black pants and white shirts. It was unheard of. Everyone dressed different and stylish."

These are the words of Rav Aaron Rakeffet in an interview that he gave to the Jewish Press. Rabbi Rakeffet has been a mechanech for over 50 years both in America but more notably in Eretz Yisrael, and has taught and inspired thousands of people over the years; Rabbi Rakeffet currently gives shiurim at YU's Gruss Kollel in Israel. Rabbi Rakeffet once noted that "If we take the point of view that we have to educate students but not clone them, then...we just have to say לא דרכי דרכיכם ולא מחשבותי מחשבותיכם..and.. As a rebbe for so many years, I pride myself that I never tried to clone my students...I have so many students that became Chasidim, Chabadnikim, someone found their roots going back to Belz, I even have a Gerrer or two among the thousands of students I taught over the years, and so many different lifestyles. Ribbono shel `Olam, as long as they are filled with Torah and Yirat Shamayim, why should I object? … Do I have to feel that if they don’t think exactly the way I do I failed? Chas V’Chalila ".

This is the most important aspect of chinuch that is unfortunately missing all to often today. In our quest to achieve only excellence in both limudei kodesh and limudei chol often times the yeshivos expect clones who act dress and think the same and they are not equipped to handle students who are different or those who might learn differently. Rabbi Rakeffet said that in his day, Roshei Yeshiva were seen as being mortal human beings who people could relate to and it was only the influence of the chassidim who turned Litvishe Roshei Yeshiva into immortal beings. "There’s da’as Torah. Bachurim worship the ground their rosh yeshiva walks on. That didn’t exist when I grew up. When I grew up the roshei yeshiva were mortals. There was no da’as Torah. You could argue with them. But who ever argued with a chassidic rebbe?"

A number of years ago Rabbi Horowitz wrote a post he called Charedi Classic (which can also be applied to the Modern Orthodox community) in which he argued that we need to turn back the clock to a time when Orthodox Jews were that, Orthodox Jews. He argues that the current system tried to fix something that was not broken to begin with and as a result of trying to fix it broke it, (I would argue beyond repair at this point). Rabbi Horowitz wrote the following "It is humbling and difficult to come to terms with, let alone say this publicly, but I think that your generation had a far better recipe than ours, though both generations have their successes and failures. You prepared us for secular culture whereas we shelter our children from it. You played offense; we play defense. You celebrated the enrollment of each and every Jewish child to a Mesivta or Bais Yaakov; we send rejection letters. You raised children; we tried to raise gedolim.
Over the past few years, I’ve increasingly felt that the most effective way of reversing the exploding number of kids and adults abandoning Yiddishkeit is to revert to the old-fashioned “Charedi Classic” education my generation was fortunate to receive from yours; and pass on those core values to our children and grandchildren.

Maybe it's time our community began to listen to people like Rabbi Rakeffet and Rabbi Horowitz, see where things went wrong and try and fix them. Every child is not going to be the rosh yeshiva or a lawyer. Every child is not cut out to sit and learn or even go to college. We need to be real about our priorities and how we raise and educate our children. Real goals and education alternatives, including trade schools, need to be set up and chinuch alternatives to every child mastering gemorah must be introduced.

Yadeinu Lo Shafchu Es Hadam Ha Zeh

Elul is a month for introspection, so let's introspect.

In yesterday's parshah we read about eglah arufah. Eglah arufah teaches rabbinic responsibility. It shows that it was the gedolim of the time who were responsible to get up in front of the town after the body was found and say "yadeinu" our hands. It is we, your leaders, who are responsible and it is we who have the blood on our hands. We should have taught you better than to let the stranger leave town. We should have been mechanech the people better so that they knew right from wrong.

We are living in times when up appears to be down, down is up. Criminals are tzadikim Rabbonim are freely called reshaim for having hashkafic differences, every other week we read about another person from the Orthodox community being arrested for something else. There is violence in the streets of Israel and now protests in the streets on NY all called for by rabbonim. And if that were not bad enough, we are bankrupting ourselves out of our own lives with the exorbitant education costs. There was a letter on Chump's blog the other day where the writer pointed out the absurdity that a family making over $100,000 in our community is considered poor somehow and needs to ask the school for a scholarship to send their kids to school. We live in a diverse community with thousands of school age children all coming from different types of families in different income scales and yet the schools are designed to cater only to the top 10% of earners with the other 90% or so needing to be on some type of scholarship or tzedakah. Does any of this make sense? Where are the rabbonim in all this? This is their community and lord knows many of them pay lip service to lower tuition but where are they to assist those in getting a low cost school off the ground? Where are they when schools are bankrupting the community and forcing families to choose between paying their tuition or paying for food? It's nice of them to ask their congregations to give money to organizations like NNJ Kids, but where are they to demand that NNJ Kids hold the schools responsible for lowering tuition before making any advances, and if they can't let them use the money to seed a school that will hold costs low?

Yadanu Lo shafchu? There are financial crimes in the MO community as well, and is it surprising with the costs of living? I am frankly shocked that we don't hear about more of them, I guess the criminals in the MO community are smart enough to take off their yarmulkah's before they are carted away, but I maintain it's only a matter of time, I hope I am wrong.

In a few weeks the chazan and the Rav are going to stand up before kol nidrei and ask "v' nislach l'chol adas binei yisrael u l ger hagar b' socham ki l' chol haam bishgagah" Is it really shgagah when we are knowingly bringing these things upon ourselves? Can the rabbonim declare that it is b'shgaga when year after year they allow tuition costs to sky rocket and don't do a thing to change the system? Is it bishgagah when we have created this migdal bavel to ourselves and no one has the guts to stand up and yell dayeinu?

During this time of Elul and Yimei Hadin when we are encouraged to introspect, let our community as a whole do an introspection and I believe the conclusion will be that we had better do something drastic soon or there will not be a community left to ask mechilah for. Before the rabbonim come to the community and request on our behalf "kaper L Amcha Yisrael", let them be in a position to say "Yadeinu Lo Shafchu Es Hadam Hazeh".